when realization comes upon you that everything you've been given now is a blessing from Him, by His grace alone all things happen...

"That man, the one you're ignoring right now, is the answer to the prayer that you've been praying for for almost a year before God opens the door for you to step into. That persona, those characters...aren't they so different from how people said he would be?" 

tears flow. should realization come only through such happenings? 

but what matter is the truth, right? the realization of the truth that can only bring me closer to God despite all the mess that I'm in. doesn't matter how it happened, how painful, but the truth that surfaced is what matter. 

only there, I've seen that every every single thing that I'm given now is from God and I need to treasure them. Treasure this human being who is walking quietly beside me.

The words I'm writing here comes from my diary that I've written a few days ago and what I wrote was what went through my mind when something was happening a few days ago. 

What happened the past one year..

not sure if he is the one I should learn to know deeper about. I heard things about him that are unpleasant too. and I understand that it takes some kinds of patients to deal with one like him. but I do not want to judge him. mother Theresa once said that if you only judge a person, you'll not be able to love him... although I had a certain preconception about him...what happened from friday till yesterday had proven it wrong.
somebody once told me that he does not know how to love and give in a way that I do. but he did. 


.......................



I can't continue, I think I'm not ready to expose so much of my feelings online. I just want to share the part that after that weekend, I experienced a love I know can only flow from Jesus. and if you are reading this, I discovered something about you that I never expected to discover. it was a pleasant surprise, thank you.


"Love is patient, Love is kind" 
indeed...

♥ 1:25 AM

This album is a gift from someone, just recently.
Not too sure why I was given, but I guess this is a favour from God. The songs in this album is good. I'll be listening to this album as I study for tomorrow's CHA quiz, this afternoon.

It's been some time since people bought albums for me. I remembered the time in J2 when a dude from another class gave me the latest Avril Lavigne album just because I mentioned that I like Avril Lavigne during a facebook chat, I don't really talk to this person in school but we are facebook friends somehow. Things used to work that way when I was still a girl in uniform, where I don't talk much to people in school but we are chatting friends on facebook. Used to have lots of those during the mayflower time especially. Now it seems funny that I look back, but it nice too. When you were young, you're free to do most of the things you want before the society start shaping your behavior and thoughts. And when you were young, you have so much time to socialize, chat with people and form multiple relationships ( I REALLY MEAN AS FRIENDS, NOT WHAT YOU ARE THINKING THERE ) with different people that are outside your comfort zone.

Wait, how did I get from talking about albums to talking about this.

Anyhow, I haven't written in such a diary-like manner in blog for some time. (: Let there be this small change once in a while.

off to study for CHA!(:

♥ 4:58 PM